Sunday, May 08, 2005

Talk about me OR talk about you

[The following is a distillation and extrapolation of thoughts and an observation I received from my wife, Tara.]

Christians in the U.S. are notorious for gossip. That, however, is not what this is about. Even if the following has no gossip involved, the following proposal still stands . . . as a proposal.

I propose this (that's code for, "I currently have a thought that I think I might like someday, but I really need to think through it and I really need to have other people challenge and/or expand it):

-- people who do not have much to say about their own life but only seem to talk about other people are, 94.7% of the time, living without personal growth --

I tire of conversations about other stuff WHEN there is no conversation about who I am talking with. Not in that prying, pre-gossip way. If I ask most people (including friends) what's going on, I'll get surface answers or situations. But seldom if ever will someone tell me what they are going through personally. I appreciate that they don't want to gossip or speak negative about someone else. But is that ALL that happens to Believers on a personal level? Is there no celebration of what God IS doing? Is ALL growth only from pain? Is all celebration, then, a post-pain party!!?! Are all Believers relegated to simply learning how to "praise God in the midst of trials?" Is there NOTHING positive that happens without difficulty?

I propose that the answer to the above questions is, "no." I have met some as of late who ARE willing to speak of their lives AND whose lives are not all filled with sorrow. The celebration of the adoption of a child. The joy does NOT come from the companion "low" of not having a child by natural methods. It just comes from adopting a child. And from experiencing the Biblical idea of adoption. And from rescuing a child from a usually-destructive future. And from fulfilling what they believe the Spirit has led them to do.

So therein lies my proposal. I should dare-say that if one does agree with this, then they are obliged to (1) speak of what is going on and (2) find what God is doing without pain.


BAB said...

But what about pain? Isn't it a valid and important experience? In fact, it seems like it might be the most universal experience.

I do take your encouragement because I have a tendancy to dwell on the painful. We are to live thankful. I need to grow in that area.


David M said...

"the most universal experience" - I must say . . . YIKES! Then I must retract that emotional outburst and say, "Is that true or is that what your world-view affords you?"

The Auca Indians of Ecuador (no, that is NOT some made-up tribe from a Dr. Suess book!) had children who never complained and never whined. It wasn't their culture to do so.

Masochists (sp? - people who like pain) see pain as opposite of non-Masochists (a.k.a. "normal people"). Who is "right"?

Pain and the relationship one sees between pain, the cause of pain, and the self (the direct object of pain) is fully subjective.